Grandma had just died so my mom, Clara, decided to go over to her house and have a look around in her attic. She invited me, Megan, to come along. It was a big old Victorian style house with a huge attic and there was a ton of stuff up there. It wasn’t very well lit so mom brought along a flashlight.
After poking around for a while I found a strange contraption. It seemed to kind of mechanical and was about the size of a pizza box. It had a wooden frame, it was open on top and you could see a bunch of rods and pulleys in it and it had a crank on the side. I called my mother over and asked her about it.
Mom said it was over a hundred years old and it was an invention of her great great great aunt Lydia. Lydia was renowned for her great moral rectitude. She had invented to help make the world a better, more moral place. She called it the Adjudikator. It’s a quick and reliable device for the removal of testicles from the scrotum of a male.
Mom shined the flashlight down into it and I looked more closely and saw a sliding panel, cranks, clamps, slicing blades, snipping blades, a broad funnel, and in the center, a waiting jar.
Megan: Wow, that’s really neat! What kind of animals was it used on?
Clara: Animals? Oh no, it was used on men! Your aunt Lydia had very strong views on how to solve social problems. Many of these were manufactured. There was even a book written about it at the time. There should even be a copy of it around here somewhere.
M: So it was actually used?
C: Oh yes, in fact sometimes it was overused. In the wild territories out west many of the judges were women and many men were sentenced to be ‘corrected’ using the Adjudikator.
M: That’s awful!
C: Yes, you are right. And more recently there have even been cases where this device has been misused.
C: Yes. Some sex workers called dominatrixes bought Adjudikators in antique shops and online. They told their clients it was a new tool for sex play but when the men found out what it was really for it was too late. Ha ha!
M: Mom! That’s not funny!
C: Ha ha! Well, I guess you’re right. After they used it a few times the sex workers had to quickly leave town and change their names. But they felt it was worth it.
M: You sure know a lot about these women, mom.
C: Well, if you can keep a secret I’ll tell you that I was one of them!
C: Yes! The thing is that after you’ve used it a couple times it kind of becomes addictive.
M: When was the last time you used it?
C: Well, have you ever noticed how sweet and quiet and cuddly your dad is?
M: Mom, you don’t mean…?
C: Yup. I’ll show you the little jar with his thingies in it when we go home.
M: But that’s so mean. You tricked dad into letting you do it to him?
C: Oh no, I didn’t trick him. We had played with it on a number of occasions but never went all the way. But then your dad became obsessed with going all the way. So…
M: So, you humored him?
C: I have to tell you it was quite an intense experience.
M: I’ll bet. But I still don’t understand…
C: Well, some men just have a deep need to give themselves totally to a strong woman.
M: Wow, men sure are weird. So, now, does he ever regret it?
C: Oh, no. He’s quite happy being a eunuch. In fact, I’m sure he’d be quite willing to discuss it with you.
M: That’d be cool.
C: Yes, he loves talking about it and he loves showing it off too, if you’d be interested.
M: Showing it off?
C: Yes, why not? You’re old enough to handle it. When we get together to talk about it we can also ask him to show us what he looks like down there, in his private area where the changes were made.
M: Isn’t it kind of gross?
C: Oh, no, it’s quite cute. There isn’t really much to see. His scrotum has completely disappeared and his peeny has shrunk down to a tiny size.
M: Sounds awesome, mom. Can I invite some of my girlfriends over too, to see it?
C: I don’t see why not. The more the merrier! But you have to promise not to use the Adjudikator on any of your boyfriends.
M: OK, mom, me and my friends will promise to be good.
C: “Good. Oh look, here’s that book I was telling you about.” Clara picked up a small antique book with a green cloth cover with gold lettering on it. She handed it to Megan.
M: Thanks mom! This looks really neat! I can’t wait to read it!